Sunday, December 23, 2012

What can I use to clean lots of human feces from floor before installing vinyl flooring?

Q. I'm planning on finishing the bedroom renovations for a ten year old autistic kid who eats the plaster off the walls and smears his feces every night. We tore out the remaining 1/3 of the plaster and lath and installed 5/8 OSB then glued down 4x8 sheets of fiberglass to the walls. Before my five foster sons and I got home, the mom called to say that her son had ripped the fiberglass panels off the wall and tore them up. So we went back the next day and it was no more pretty walls, now it was bullet proof walls. The kid taught us our engineering was inadequate. So we cut more Fiberglas panels but this time, after we glued them in place, we screwed 3 inch molding to the top, 8 inch baseboard (painted white) to the bottom, THEN we installed inch and a half aluminum strips over the seams between panels. We also put beads of caulk under each strip and piece of wood to make them water and poop proof.
This weekend my sons and I are going to install a subdued light green vinyl floor over quarter inch under layment then caulk the seams and install quarter round trim on the floor. We are also going to build a low platform covered with vinyl flooring on top and fiberglass on the side as a bed frame to support the vinyl covered detention center grade mattress.
Anybody know of a good solution for cleaning human feces prior to installing the underlayment?
After work I will take the guys to a Taos gallery opening where we can get a root beer and a burger with grey poop on mustard.
Good news, the fiberglas pannels work beautifully; mom says they are amazingly easy to clean.
Thank you all for the cleaning informtion.
NOTE: This ten-year-old cannot dress himself, cannot feed himself, does not speak. He is HANDICAPPED NOT POSESSED. Religious nuts crawl out of the woodwork like cockroaches.

A. Remove the bulk material by scraping, then use 10% bleach to remove the rest. A box of "Rags in a Box" or something similar that you can throw out when done will help.

You might also suggest using something like an epoxy paint on the walls- something that can be cleaned up more easily later. Ditto with the floor; the engineered epoxy paints designed for garages (without the abrasive chips in them) would be extremely rugged.

Good luck.


What are some Valentines day Pranks I can play on my boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend of two years and I have challenged eachother to pranks for Valentines, and I have NO Idea what to do! People are getting really excited to see what we come up with, and I've got nothing! Help!

A. If you can get into his apartment or bedroom when he's not there, you could plaster every surface with pictures of you (weird pics are better) with "I Wuv U" or some other silly message scrawled on every picture. Spend a few bucks at your local photocopy store to mass-produce your weird photos in the hundreds.
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The "stuff his car with inflated balloons" prank I hear all the time is old. But here's a variation on that. Cover his car (or bike, or refrigerator) with hearts! But you don't want to damage the surface of his car/bike/whatever. So you use magnets! I couldn't find heart-shaped magnets in bulk, but you could order a pack of 72 one-inch rectangular magnets for $3.99: http://www.orientaltrading.com/ui/browse/processRequest.do?demandPrefix=11&productId=IN-48/2573&mode=Unknown&requestURI=processProductsCatalog&xsaleSku=57/9500&sku=48/2573&cm_sp=Cross%20Sell-_-Product%20Detail-_-Product%20Detail

Glue a heart to every magnet. Stick them all over his car, and voila! He has a car that is dotted with hearts! Or you could glue *anything* on those magnets. Suddenly his car is dotted with 72 Elmo heads! Or 72 cookies (stickers OR real cookies!) Find something round that looks like big dots, and glue it on those magnets to "polka-dot his car".

Even sillier: buy the 12-foot lengths of magnetic strips. Glue stuff to the strips before applying them to his car. Even better, if you have craft skills, see if you can find some fake fur at the fabric store, and buy 2 yards of it. Cut the fur into one-inch wide strips that are six feet long. Attach two 6-foot fur strips to each 12-foot long magnetic strip. Glue or hot glue might not work, but with a needle and thread you could loop the thread through the fur and around the magnetic strip about every 10 inches so it stays on. The finished product is several 12-foot-long magnetic FURRY STRIPES that you use to decorate his car! I vote for hot pink fur! Here are the magnetic strips I'm talking about:
http://www.orientaltrading.com/ui/browse/processRequest.do?demandPrefix=11&productId=IN-57/1500&mode=Unknown&requestURI=processProductsCatalog&xsaleSku=57/9500&sku=57/1500&cm_sp=Cross%20Sell-_-Product%20Detail-_-Product%20Detail

Perhaps you could apply glue to one side of the magnetic strip, and cover it completely with pink glitter. Then you'll have pink glitter stripes to add to his car! It will be a super-girly car.

Instead of waiting for the magnets or magnetic strips to be shipped to you, I bet you could find some in your local crafts store. Magnetic sheets are fun to play with, too. You can take a 8" by 11" or larger magnetic sheet, and paint or glue the sign for a fake business on it. Attach it to his car, and voila! he's driving the company car of some weird business. Be sure to include his name in the business slogan:

Mike's Balloon Excursions for Kids. "Every child should have the Balloon Boy experience!" (include picture of balloon boy's silver balloon)
Jason's Taxidermy Service "We really know our stuff."
Steve's Drilling Service "Your Hole Is Our Goal"

That last one is from here: http://www.holyducttape.com/gallery/holevan.jpg

Here are more business signs--make up your own version for the magnetic sheet:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiunVXThzxR1Ivz5vYgKB_QOOZdmAQJY27O8tmqTWzxMfVMnukyKM3dtonFQUIc1ukYwoQdo78DUIxQqKtEE2VAtf4a-PEIFmbnYk2lvBC8ceWcXfQdF5DPomYQTxwdU-AfRRJOL92uRRoz/s400/funny-sex-truck-sign.jpg

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/105/293903543_96b49c049d.jpg
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This next pair of pranks requires your best geek skills, or assistance from a geek. And it works only if you have access to your boyfriend's computer.

Easy computer prank: set up a ridiculous screensaver image. It can be a weird animation or picture, or, it could be the kind or screen that looks like your computer's hard drive has failed (but don't give him a heart attack!)

Hard computer prank: takes a bit of skilled effort in advance: go to Tucows.com and download a font editor utility. Edit a font so that the letter "i" is dotted with a heart. Do all this on your computer, and save the font file on a flash drive. Sneak into his computer, download the font from the flash drive into the system's font collection, and make it his default font for the internet. I did this to someone before--it's very subtle. They really crack up when they suddenly notice that every "i" is dotted with a heart.
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Mean pranks, of the "hope he doesn't have a heart attack" variety:
Besides making it look like his computer just died, there's the old "leave the used pregnancy test on the bathroom sink." A variation on that works if you already had a child with your boyfriend/husband: print out the following web page, and leave it on your desk or somewhere that he'll notice it: http://www.dnatesting.com/
Some guys, like my little brother, actually enjoy mean pranks that don't hurt anyone, but that are kinda scary.
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I also like the human heart idea suggested by "Justice"--guys who like horror flicks might actually love it. And since many guys think valentine's day is an annoyance, they might like the irreverence of the "here's my bloody heart" message. Could you get a cow's heart from the local butcher? Er, that might be too gross for you to deal with.


What are some cool and cute things to make for room decor?
Q. I'm moving in a couple of weeks and wanted to design my room. I will buy some new things, but its always good to save money right?

I've already made a heart out of a notebook wire ring (cute)
Gotten a whole bunch of CDs to hang or put somewhere
Bunch of drawings

also ive heard of drawing or collageing a lap shade so ill probably do that.

Anything else would be great! thanks! :]

A. There's a lot of cool ideas on the following websites:
www.bhg.com/crafts/kids/rainy-day/teen-bedroom-crafts
www.favecrafts.com/Bedroom
www.countryliving.com/crafts/projects/make-craft-room-0306
www.goodhousekeeping.com � ... � Home Decor Gallery
Just make sure you room flows together by trying to have a lot of the colors match or the same style type of thing i.e. birdhouses, hearts, etc.
Hope this helps :)


Anyone against white leather sofa with 4 kids?
Q. I found a great sectional sofa at Z gallery, however I think white is my best design choice. The family room is open to the kitchen which has cherry and black wood cabinets. The floor in the family room is a hardwood stained black. Any opinion on this considering I have three kids under 6 and one on the way.

A. LOL - maybe preggo brain has set in? J/K ;) No way would I go with a white *anything* with children that age. Unless you consistently want to be saying, "No," to your kids, go with something that won't be ruined if they behave like kids.

Seriously - DH and I have come to the conclusion that in the living parts of the house (read: anything that's not our bedroom), we won't have anything that we'd freak out about if it were ruined. Our kids are our first priority and we arrange our lives around them. In 10-12 years or so, we'll be able to start introducing the nicer stuff into the house. Until then, it's a small price to pay to have easy maintenance stuff so our kids don't have to tiptoe around the house for fear of breaking/staining/ruining items we love.

I figure if there's a way to make your life easier before the problems set in, do it that way ;)

Good luck!





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