How can I find out if I am bipolar with out going to the doctor?
Q. I believe I may have bipolar disorder as I fit most of the symptoms but I do not want to visit my doctor as my mum works at the doctors surgery and will know I am there. Is there any way u could go about finding out if I have the disorder without going to the doctor? Bearing in mind I am 15 so I would need parental consent for most things.
A. Most people think that bipolar moods are constantly switching, but in fact, bipolar moods last weeks to months. In a bipolar mania, a person will go weeks to months needing very little sleep - like just a couple of hours, or maybe 3 or 4 hours, or maybe NO sleep, and they are not tired, do not need naps, do not have insomnia - they just don't need to sleep. It's rare to get bipolar before age 15, and AT age 15, it's VERY unlikely you would already have enough data to diagnose bipolar anyhow. Child bipolar was made up by some psychiatrists at Harvard in order to expand the antipsychotic market, and those doctors have been disciplined, I've read on psychiatry blogs written by psychiatrists. Bipolar before say, age 14, is REALLY rare, if it ever happens (maybe a brain injury could cause it). Usually, it's kids who are being abused, or in an unstable home, and they are drugged into better behavior, at the cost of their physical health and ability to think. Few cases of child bipolar ever developed into adult bipolar, which is how it's become clear it's been a scam.
If you have bipolar, your mother would KNOW it. You would lie in bed for months, lose interest in all your friends and hobbies, and your grades would go down dramatically (mine went from all A's my whole life, to all F's, my first bipolar depression!)
The library has self-help books on depression.
Many meds cause or worsen depression, including birth control, blood pressure, pain, acne, antipsychotic, anxiety (benzos) or sleeping medications, alcohol, illicit drugs and MANY others.
Hypothyroidism mimics depression . Too little sleep, or sleep disorders like sleep apnea, or interrupted sleep (crying baby, barking dog) can cause depression.
If depression is worse in winter, use a light box (10,000 Lux (light intensity) at about 20� - about $300 online, you don't need full spectrum, Sunray is a good brand). I have extra windows, painted the walls peach & yellow & have a skylight. There's a link to a cheaper lightbox & more info at psycheducation.org. Also you can try 1000 to 2000 IU of Vitamin D in winter. It may work, or may be placebo treatment.
Try meditation like progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery. See The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne. Free 15 minute guided imagery at healthjourneys.com and many free meditations at youtube.
Go out with friends, & if you don't have any, join a club e.g. hobby club, bowling league & MAKE yourself go. �Isolating� makes depression worse!
Exercise 1/2 hour a day, & anytime you feel depressed or anxious. LOTS OF RESEARCH SUPPORTS THIS as the most effective depression treatment of all.
Insomnia?: Go to bed & get up the same time each day, even weekends. Don't use your bedroom to watch TV, read or use the computer. Don't do stuff that revs you up before bed, like exercising & using the computer. Light from computer screens & TV wakes you up. Blue light is the worst offender � dim the lights and use an old-fashioned incandescent bulb the last hour. Make the bedroom very dark, even cover up the clock. Mask disturbing sounds with a fan or try soundsleeping.com or youtube, etc. Avoid caffeine after noon.
Put colorful, happy things around the house. Do nice things for yourself. Make a list of things that make you happy, like: bread fresh from the oven, the crisp sound of a saltine cracker breaking, fresh sheets on the bed, touching frost on the windowpane, etc. Read that list when you are down. Use comforting scents. I like vanilla & cloves.
Work on time management if you are overwhelmed. Cut back on other responsibilities so you can spend more time with friends & family. Ask for help with chores.
Spend more time with your pet, if you have one.
DON'T listen to sad music! Listen to upbeat stuff- same with movies & novels.
DISTRACT yourself. Read a novel, watch a comedy, go out with friends, play cards or a video game, whatever keeps your mind busy.
Volunteer. Helping others makes you feel better about yourself & you make a difference, too. If you are religious, your religion may help keep you involved in the community.
Put a half-smile on your face. Changing your expression is proven to help change mood.
Try free computerized cognitive behavioral therapy at moodgym.anu.edu.au. Also, if you have an abuse history, it is likely to be a major cause of your depression.
If you have bipolar, your mother would KNOW it. You would lie in bed for months, lose interest in all your friends and hobbies, and your grades would go down dramatically (mine went from all A's my whole life, to all F's, my first bipolar depression!)
The library has self-help books on depression.
Many meds cause or worsen depression, including birth control, blood pressure, pain, acne, antipsychotic, anxiety (benzos) or sleeping medications, alcohol, illicit drugs and MANY others.
Hypothyroidism mimics depression . Too little sleep, or sleep disorders like sleep apnea, or interrupted sleep (crying baby, barking dog) can cause depression.
If depression is worse in winter, use a light box (10,000 Lux (light intensity) at about 20� - about $300 online, you don't need full spectrum, Sunray is a good brand). I have extra windows, painted the walls peach & yellow & have a skylight. There's a link to a cheaper lightbox & more info at psycheducation.org. Also you can try 1000 to 2000 IU of Vitamin D in winter. It may work, or may be placebo treatment.
Try meditation like progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery. See The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne. Free 15 minute guided imagery at healthjourneys.com and many free meditations at youtube.
Go out with friends, & if you don't have any, join a club e.g. hobby club, bowling league & MAKE yourself go. �Isolating� makes depression worse!
Exercise 1/2 hour a day, & anytime you feel depressed or anxious. LOTS OF RESEARCH SUPPORTS THIS as the most effective depression treatment of all.
Insomnia?: Go to bed & get up the same time each day, even weekends. Don't use your bedroom to watch TV, read or use the computer. Don't do stuff that revs you up before bed, like exercising & using the computer. Light from computer screens & TV wakes you up. Blue light is the worst offender � dim the lights and use an old-fashioned incandescent bulb the last hour. Make the bedroom very dark, even cover up the clock. Mask disturbing sounds with a fan or try soundsleeping.com or youtube, etc. Avoid caffeine after noon.
Put colorful, happy things around the house. Do nice things for yourself. Make a list of things that make you happy, like: bread fresh from the oven, the crisp sound of a saltine cracker breaking, fresh sheets on the bed, touching frost on the windowpane, etc. Read that list when you are down. Use comforting scents. I like vanilla & cloves.
Work on time management if you are overwhelmed. Cut back on other responsibilities so you can spend more time with friends & family. Ask for help with chores.
Spend more time with your pet, if you have one.
DON'T listen to sad music! Listen to upbeat stuff- same with movies & novels.
DISTRACT yourself. Read a novel, watch a comedy, go out with friends, play cards or a video game, whatever keeps your mind busy.
Volunteer. Helping others makes you feel better about yourself & you make a difference, too. If you are religious, your religion may help keep you involved in the community.
Put a half-smile on your face. Changing your expression is proven to help change mood.
Try free computerized cognitive behavioral therapy at moodgym.anu.edu.au. Also, if you have an abuse history, it is likely to be a major cause of your depression.
Where can I get cheap things to decorate my sons room?
Q. Ok I'm moving to a new apartment and my son is going to finally get his own bedroom. He just turned 4 years old and I have no idea where to look for cheap things to decorate his room. His favorite characters are disney cars and thomas the train..me and my husband are on a budget...and we all know disney cars and thomas are not cheap. so any ideas?
A. I would avoid the actual Disney charecter stuff. Not only is it a little expensive, there is a good change he'll complain it is too babyish in two years. Plus, he already had toys with those charecters.
To save money, get stuff you could see in an 8 year old's room.
Bedding I think works for a 4 year old and an older boy:
http://www.target.com/DwellStudio-Target-Studio-Hippo-Comforter/dp/B002GQTT2Q/ref=sc_iw_r_1_0/192-0018856-5111635
http://www.target.com/Olive-Kids-Animals-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001R1M2FW/ref=br_1_34?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=2&searchSize=30&id=Olive%20Kids%20Animals%20Bedding%20Collection
http://www.target.com/DwellStudio-Target-Vehicles-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001SIM6H8/ref=br_1_104?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=4&searchSize=30&id=DwellStudio%20Target%20Vehicles%20Bedding%20Collection
http://www.target.com/Circo-Robot-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001N5WZX6/ref=br_1_88?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=3&searchSize=30&id=Circo%20Robot%20Bedding%20Collection
For wall art, posters make a big impression. I reccomend picking posters that will fit in frames the same color as the furniture. That way later on you can just change the posters.
If the furniture is dark brown in his room, you can get this frame set for $30 http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/product.asp?order_num=-1&SKU=16566594&RN=88 You could get these:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28186201
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28186176
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21827318
for $44.00
To save money, get stuff you could see in an 8 year old's room.
Bedding I think works for a 4 year old and an older boy:
http://www.target.com/DwellStudio-Target-Studio-Hippo-Comforter/dp/B002GQTT2Q/ref=sc_iw_r_1_0/192-0018856-5111635
http://www.target.com/Olive-Kids-Animals-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001R1M2FW/ref=br_1_34?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=2&searchSize=30&id=Olive%20Kids%20Animals%20Bedding%20Collection
http://www.target.com/DwellStudio-Target-Vehicles-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001SIM6H8/ref=br_1_104?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=4&searchSize=30&id=DwellStudio%20Target%20Vehicles%20Bedding%20Collection
http://www.target.com/Circo-Robot-Bedding-Collection/dp/B001N5WZX6/ref=br_1_88?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=4182801&node=4182801&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=3&searchSize=30&id=Circo%20Robot%20Bedding%20Collection
For wall art, posters make a big impression. I reccomend picking posters that will fit in frames the same color as the furniture. That way later on you can just change the posters.
If the furniture is dark brown in his room, you can get this frame set for $30 http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/product.asp?order_num=-1&SKU=16566594&RN=88 You could get these:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28186201
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28186176
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21827318
for $44.00
Why are people so against cosleeping?
Q. I understand that you shouldn't for newborns because it's simply not safe but when they are older. There has been so much research that states it's better for the child emotionally. It's wonderful to wake up in the morning and just stare at your beautiful child sleeping and as they enter toddlerhood they are really snuggly! It's beautiful! I have heard people say that you will never get them out of your bed.....I truly can't see a 16 year old still wanting to share a bed with their parents. As for sex life there are plenty of other opportunities otherwise parents who cosleep with child number 1 wouldn't have child number 2, 3 or maybe 4!
So why?
So why?
A. This was my answer in another question in the Toddler/Preschooler section but applies here as well:
I know some people won't agree here, but it's just an observation from my life and what I've noticed around me.
Kids who are constantly pushed out of their parents bed want to keep coming back the older they get. My sister snuck into my parents room nightly until she was almost 12. My dad would pitch a fit and make her leave... she was almost 12!!! I have noticed this similar behavior with friends' kids and other family members.
Yet the kids who were welcomed w/ opened arms into their parents' bed - even purposely created a family bed w/ no intentions of buying a crib from birth - they're the ones who decide on their own as toddlers/preschoolers that they're ready to have some stretching room. Or they're at least more receptive to transition to their own bed, then their own room.
The latter is what happened in my house. My daughter slept w/ us pretty much since birth. With our encouragement at 18 months, we started her in a toddler bed (pinched between our bed and the wall). At 20 months our bed started moving further and further away from her bed to the opposite end of the room. By her 2nd bday, she claimed the master bedroom and we took on the other room (worked out because she had more room to play, and we hardly have any bedroom furniture anyway). She's now 4, sleeping in her own room, only coming to our bed when she's sick or there's a thunderstorm.
I know some people won't agree here, but it's just an observation from my life and what I've noticed around me.
Kids who are constantly pushed out of their parents bed want to keep coming back the older they get. My sister snuck into my parents room nightly until she was almost 12. My dad would pitch a fit and make her leave... she was almost 12!!! I have noticed this similar behavior with friends' kids and other family members.
Yet the kids who were welcomed w/ opened arms into their parents' bed - even purposely created a family bed w/ no intentions of buying a crib from birth - they're the ones who decide on their own as toddlers/preschoolers that they're ready to have some stretching room. Or they're at least more receptive to transition to their own bed, then their own room.
The latter is what happened in my house. My daughter slept w/ us pretty much since birth. With our encouragement at 18 months, we started her in a toddler bed (pinched between our bed and the wall). At 20 months our bed started moving further and further away from her bed to the opposite end of the room. By her 2nd bday, she claimed the master bedroom and we took on the other room (worked out because she had more room to play, and we hardly have any bedroom furniture anyway). She's now 4, sleeping in her own room, only coming to our bed when she's sick or there's a thunderstorm.
Why wont my husband have sex with me?
Q. I am attractive people try to hit on me all the time men and woman. So I know its not that. If he did not love me he could leave. He tells me he loves me and he is attracted to me but our bedroom is still cold. He just rolls over night after night. Im female and we have been together 10 years.
A. It honestly breaks my heart to see these questions. Prior to meeting my wife, I have been in a relationship or two like this. I remember how alone it makes you feel. I remember how soul crushing it was to want the person next to you to just reach over and touch you and instead they roll over and go to sleep. Unfortunately, the relationships didn't make it. i don't have the answers. I will share my experiences and thoughts. Maybe they will help you.
1. Figure out what you want. Are you looking strictly for sex? Are you looking for physical affection from someone you love, not necessarily the sex? Before you can fix the problem, you have to figure out what the problem is and what you are looking for.
2. Is there a reason for his lack of desire?: When I was 22, fit, and was a muscular 180 pounds, I could go 5 times a night if that was her desire and still want more. Add a dozen years and 50 pounds, my desire has definitely gone down. What has happened with your husband over the last decade. Has he gotten fat? Changed meds? Does he have a lot of late nights at "work" where he might be cheating? Stress? Take an honest look. Has his desires just waned? Does he not love you anymore? Is he banging someone else
3. Formulate a plan for you: There is a book by Michelle Weiner-Davis called "The Sex Starved Marriage". I have to admit that I have never read the entire book, just a few chapters. You can read the first chapter here: http://www.divorcebusting.com/sb_sex_starved_marriage.htm I think this book is highly valuable for two reasons. First, it helps you realize that it is not your fault and you are not the problem. Second, it offers some options to help.
Based on your particular situation, formulate a plan. Sit down with your spouse one day. Tell them that there is a huge problem and you are not looking to find fault, but rather you want help fixing it. Don't make them feel threatened and offer them time afterward to "digest" things if they need it. Lay it on the line. Tell them what the problem is (no physical intimacy). Tell them how it makes you feel (make it good. Figure out how to tell them about the pain and the loneliness in a way they would understand). Propose a timeline of events. Say that over the next 3 months, you want to have sex 1 time per week. If that does not work, months 3 to 6 you will seek the advice of a marriage counselor and you really want them to join. If by month 6 things don't change, then you will have to prepare to go your own ways. You have to mean it and if you want life to get better, you have to be prepared to leave.
Plan out what you are going to say. think of it as an intervention. Know what you are going to say in advance.
With any luck, your spouse will agree to work on things. The website I gave you earlier also has a section on sex starved marriages. Read it to see if you can get any ideas (http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=postlist&Board=54&page=1)
4. Prepare to dedicate time, money, and energy: If you have to go to counseling, make sure you make time to get there (without the kids if you have them). Make time for the two of you. Even if you are flat broke, get away for a weekend together. Rent an adult flick in the hotel room. Bring candles, scented oils, lingerie, alcohol.....anything to make sex desirable for both of you.
5. Communicate: It took me 15 years of relationships to realize that my SO/wife was not a mind reader. If she does something I really like or she did something that meant a lot to me, I have to tell her. If you get to the point your husband is willing to work on things,you have to communicate. What is good? What is bad? What are your fantasies?
Like I said, ultimately I had to walk (rather my SO left me for other men...a blow to the ego). Sex issues in a relationship is a terrible because one person tends to be completely happy with how things are. The book I recommended had a quote that was something like "You asked me to remain faithful and forsake all others, but you won't help me with my sexual needs". How ridiculous does that sound, but it is what you are living right now.
I hope this helps. I wish you the best!
1. Figure out what you want. Are you looking strictly for sex? Are you looking for physical affection from someone you love, not necessarily the sex? Before you can fix the problem, you have to figure out what the problem is and what you are looking for.
2. Is there a reason for his lack of desire?: When I was 22, fit, and was a muscular 180 pounds, I could go 5 times a night if that was her desire and still want more. Add a dozen years and 50 pounds, my desire has definitely gone down. What has happened with your husband over the last decade. Has he gotten fat? Changed meds? Does he have a lot of late nights at "work" where he might be cheating? Stress? Take an honest look. Has his desires just waned? Does he not love you anymore? Is he banging someone else
3. Formulate a plan for you: There is a book by Michelle Weiner-Davis called "The Sex Starved Marriage". I have to admit that I have never read the entire book, just a few chapters. You can read the first chapter here: http://www.divorcebusting.com/sb_sex_starved_marriage.htm I think this book is highly valuable for two reasons. First, it helps you realize that it is not your fault and you are not the problem. Second, it offers some options to help.
Based on your particular situation, formulate a plan. Sit down with your spouse one day. Tell them that there is a huge problem and you are not looking to find fault, but rather you want help fixing it. Don't make them feel threatened and offer them time afterward to "digest" things if they need it. Lay it on the line. Tell them what the problem is (no physical intimacy). Tell them how it makes you feel (make it good. Figure out how to tell them about the pain and the loneliness in a way they would understand). Propose a timeline of events. Say that over the next 3 months, you want to have sex 1 time per week. If that does not work, months 3 to 6 you will seek the advice of a marriage counselor and you really want them to join. If by month 6 things don't change, then you will have to prepare to go your own ways. You have to mean it and if you want life to get better, you have to be prepared to leave.
Plan out what you are going to say. think of it as an intervention. Know what you are going to say in advance.
With any luck, your spouse will agree to work on things. The website I gave you earlier also has a section on sex starved marriages. Read it to see if you can get any ideas (http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=postlist&Board=54&page=1)
4. Prepare to dedicate time, money, and energy: If you have to go to counseling, make sure you make time to get there (without the kids if you have them). Make time for the two of you. Even if you are flat broke, get away for a weekend together. Rent an adult flick in the hotel room. Bring candles, scented oils, lingerie, alcohol.....anything to make sex desirable for both of you.
5. Communicate: It took me 15 years of relationships to realize that my SO/wife was not a mind reader. If she does something I really like or she did something that meant a lot to me, I have to tell her. If you get to the point your husband is willing to work on things,you have to communicate. What is good? What is bad? What are your fantasies?
Like I said, ultimately I had to walk (rather my SO left me for other men...a blow to the ego). Sex issues in a relationship is a terrible because one person tends to be completely happy with how things are. The book I recommended had a quote that was something like "You asked me to remain faithful and forsake all others, but you won't help me with my sexual needs". How ridiculous does that sound, but it is what you are living right now.
I hope this helps. I wish you the best!
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Title Post: How can I find out if I am bipolar with out going to the doctor?
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Author: Unknown
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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