Should Kids be allowed to be in robe all day and play computer games, mother is at work, no father.?
Q. 14 yr old stays in robe , lives in bedroom playing video games all day. What do you recommend? Arguments/ discussions have started between me and her about situation, not normal to me and she says what is the big deal.
A. It is normal for teens these days...but not good for him (or the many other teens).. He needs to socialize, learn responsibility and have fun outside of the house.. I also don't think a 14 year old should have a computer in his room.. If it's going to be in his room there should be blocks on it preventing him from going to sites a 14 year old shouldn't be going to... Gaming is sort of an addiction... I imagine if he was preventing from getting on or gaming for a day he would be irrate about it..thus saying it is an addiction..
As far as what to say to his mom...well...not much you can say.. If he's in his room on the computer he's out of her hair and she's not having to deal with him.. Encourage her to have more "family" time with him and get him out of the house.. Take him to ride four whellers, fish, minature golf etc.. Help him find a hobby that encourages human interaction and socialization.. Ask her how she thinks this kid will be when it's time to be around people and find a job?? Or maybe take the computer out of his room and limit his time on it to a few hours a day.. Or maybe everyother day he can be on it and everyother day he can't.. Tell her you're just concerned that he doesn't have a life outside of the gaming and it can cause "face to face" socialization problems in later life..
As far as what to say to his mom...well...not much you can say.. If he's in his room on the computer he's out of her hair and she's not having to deal with him.. Encourage her to have more "family" time with him and get him out of the house.. Take him to ride four whellers, fish, minature golf etc.. Help him find a hobby that encourages human interaction and socialization.. Ask her how she thinks this kid will be when it's time to be around people and find a job?? Or maybe take the computer out of his room and limit his time on it to a few hours a day.. Or maybe everyother day he can be on it and everyother day he can't.. Tell her you're just concerned that he doesn't have a life outside of the gaming and it can cause "face to face" socialization problems in later life..
What advice do you have for a mother of four?
Q. No stupid answers like stop having kids.
Im looking for answers from mothers of more than 3.
My kids are 10,9,4 and 1.
I am a military mom who get NO help from the outside.No babysitter will keep 4 and no family member will even take one at a time.
Im looking for answers from mothers of more than 3.
My kids are 10,9,4 and 1.
I am a military mom who get NO help from the outside.No babysitter will keep 4 and no family member will even take one at a time.
A. I have four kids ages range from 15 to 1. I know it can seem like a lot to handle and can be overwhelming or difficult at some stages, but there are a couple of things that will keep you sane:
-Organisation.
Try and organise anything that seems cluttered, confusing or frustrating at the moment. From kids bedrooms to daily schedules.
-Self endulgment
Get yourself out now and then. You need your own time, and make it fun and relaxing. Don't feel bad about giving a couple of hours a day just to yourself. Could be an hour in the day and an hour at night. You'll come out better from it and so will the kids.
-Try and stay on their level. Life is exciting and an adventure. Don't groan when theyve lined up all the chairs in the kitchen and pulled out all the teddies to go for a "bus ride". Smile and join in. Discover what it's like to be a kid again. They love it and you will begin to enjoy it. Quality time with the kids.
-Try and give them healthy diets. They will go crazy on high fat/sugar foods so no sugary snacks before bed or naptime and other times you dont want em bouncing off the walls. Their brains will function better on healthy foods.
-Not too much TV or screen time. Get them outside. Play a game. Join in with em. Have some fun. Run around and kick a soccer ball. Play hide and seek. Kids games. Get em active.
-Have family day once a week. The whole family getting out together. The way I look at is that if parents with toddler sextuplets can do it, then so can I with my four reasonably age different kids.
-Discipline. Okay so have a look at Supernanny (Jo Frost's) techniques. They work great. Don't know if discipline is a prob in your house, but try these Supernanny techniques. Naughty spot, reward chart, warnings, firm low tone voice, act authoritive and fair and stick the rules no lashing out and slacking back.
-Try and stay a good terms with your kids. Make sure you're not always yelling. If something is up, sit em down and chat em through it. Let em know that you're there for them and you understand. There's nothing better than being able to have a mum to turnto when things get shacky and that you know ill understand you and help you.
-Get the kids to do chores. Don't feel like its all on you. They have to know responsibilty and that being part of a family means helping one another. Keep a list of the chores they need to do and how much they get paid.
-If you feel like things are just getting too much, try and get away if possible. Work out a plan that means you can get away for a week or so. Let em sleep at grandparents or friends or other family. Keep contact though, they'll miss you!
Psychologists are good to go to. Just let it all out to the nice lady with notepad. She understands where you are coming from and makes you feel better about yourself.
Make sure you takes lots of photos and videos because they will be grown up and moved out before you know it! They don't stay babies forever, enjoy them while they are little!
Good Luck!!
-Organisation.
Try and organise anything that seems cluttered, confusing or frustrating at the moment. From kids bedrooms to daily schedules.
-Self endulgment
Get yourself out now and then. You need your own time, and make it fun and relaxing. Don't feel bad about giving a couple of hours a day just to yourself. Could be an hour in the day and an hour at night. You'll come out better from it and so will the kids.
-Try and stay on their level. Life is exciting and an adventure. Don't groan when theyve lined up all the chairs in the kitchen and pulled out all the teddies to go for a "bus ride". Smile and join in. Discover what it's like to be a kid again. They love it and you will begin to enjoy it. Quality time with the kids.
-Try and give them healthy diets. They will go crazy on high fat/sugar foods so no sugary snacks before bed or naptime and other times you dont want em bouncing off the walls. Their brains will function better on healthy foods.
-Not too much TV or screen time. Get them outside. Play a game. Join in with em. Have some fun. Run around and kick a soccer ball. Play hide and seek. Kids games. Get em active.
-Have family day once a week. The whole family getting out together. The way I look at is that if parents with toddler sextuplets can do it, then so can I with my four reasonably age different kids.
-Discipline. Okay so have a look at Supernanny (Jo Frost's) techniques. They work great. Don't know if discipline is a prob in your house, but try these Supernanny techniques. Naughty spot, reward chart, warnings, firm low tone voice, act authoritive and fair and stick the rules no lashing out and slacking back.
-Try and stay a good terms with your kids. Make sure you're not always yelling. If something is up, sit em down and chat em through it. Let em know that you're there for them and you understand. There's nothing better than being able to have a mum to turnto when things get shacky and that you know ill understand you and help you.
-Get the kids to do chores. Don't feel like its all on you. They have to know responsibilty and that being part of a family means helping one another. Keep a list of the chores they need to do and how much they get paid.
-If you feel like things are just getting too much, try and get away if possible. Work out a plan that means you can get away for a week or so. Let em sleep at grandparents or friends or other family. Keep contact though, they'll miss you!
Psychologists are good to go to. Just let it all out to the nice lady with notepad. She understands where you are coming from and makes you feel better about yourself.
Make sure you takes lots of photos and videos because they will be grown up and moved out before you know it! They don't stay babies forever, enjoy them while they are little!
Good Luck!!
Should I make my 17 year old son share a bedroom with his 7 year old and 2 month old sisters?
Q. I've always wanted to turn his bedroom into a jazzercise room. The room that the 2month old is in would be perfect for my husband's game room. We were thinking of putting the 2 month old in the 7 year old's room, and then moving the 17 year old in there too so that we could finally have our extra sace.
A. Maybe you shouldn't of had 3 kids.
At the max, how many people can live comfortably in a 4000 sq feet house?
Q. We are going to build a house and it is 4000 sq feet. There are already 6 people now- my husband's two grandmothers, parents-in-law, my husband and I. He wants to have only 4 bedrooms in the house, and I want 5, because in future, there has to be a provision for the kids and a guest bedroom also. What do you all think?
A. So that's one for you and your husband, one for your husband's parents, and one for his grandmothers. Wow, you're really going all out with the whole close-knit family thing. J/k. That's quite full house.
Yeah, you're going to have to have at least 5 minimum if you want visitors. I'd want at least 2 other rooms that could be made into a bedroom if needed.
There's your compromise right there.
The extra rooms don't have to be a bedroom, they can be anything except storage closets and when/if the time comes that they need to be made into a bedroom, they'll be there. But the rooms should exist for the potential need later on. Talk to your husband. Since you're making the house yourselves, perhaps he can extend the area a bit more, or you can discuss the potential of adding a second floor if the area is already been maxed out according to property laws and such.
At any rate, everyone needs their alone time, so there should be space enough to make that feasible. A couple hobby rooms that can be used as personal work shops would be nice, which I'm sure your husband must be thinking about that as knowing construction, he probably likes to work on things, so he's probably going to have an area for himself to work on things. Well, an extra room or 3 could be used for a variety of things that can also be quickly changed later into a bedroom for the odd case of company and/or friends, and/or even a renter if you so desire the extra income every month.
Some of those uses for extra rooms in the mean time while they're not needed as bedrooms could be a play area for the kids where they keep their toys and games, a quiet room to devote one's self to praying and reading the Bible, studying about God, a personal library with all the books your family has accumulated over the years that are sitting in boxes because you don't want to throw them away, and you don't know what else to do with them because they take up too much space, hobby rooms for you, your kids, your husband, your parents, his grandmothers, to use so that they don't have to feel like they're doing nothing in the house all day, an exercise room with weights and aerobic things, a company room for when your kids have sleep-overs and you don't want to hear them or when you have friends over for tea or a Bible study, although, the living room is usually reserved for that, having a separate room for that will help you to avoid disturbing the peace of the elderly who often enjoy periods of peaceful silence.
If someone is into film photography, you could use the room as a darkroom to develop pictures, although, if you're going to do that, you should probably discuss that before building the room as you will likely need running water, a drain, and well-placed switches for the different lights, and a way of cutting absolutely all light either from the entire room or from a section of it, such as a closet so that you can transfer the negative strip from the container to the bathing receptacle so that you can develop it.
Well, good luck. I totally agree with you, and it would be nice aesthetically, but if your husband's a practical-type, he may be more receptive to the idea of an extra room or two that can be used for other things, and later converted into a bedroom if the need arises. Just don't let it happen that they become storage closets because if that happens you'll never be able to let company use it as a bedroom.
Yeah, you're going to have to have at least 5 minimum if you want visitors. I'd want at least 2 other rooms that could be made into a bedroom if needed.
There's your compromise right there.
The extra rooms don't have to be a bedroom, they can be anything except storage closets and when/if the time comes that they need to be made into a bedroom, they'll be there. But the rooms should exist for the potential need later on. Talk to your husband. Since you're making the house yourselves, perhaps he can extend the area a bit more, or you can discuss the potential of adding a second floor if the area is already been maxed out according to property laws and such.
At any rate, everyone needs their alone time, so there should be space enough to make that feasible. A couple hobby rooms that can be used as personal work shops would be nice, which I'm sure your husband must be thinking about that as knowing construction, he probably likes to work on things, so he's probably going to have an area for himself to work on things. Well, an extra room or 3 could be used for a variety of things that can also be quickly changed later into a bedroom for the odd case of company and/or friends, and/or even a renter if you so desire the extra income every month.
Some of those uses for extra rooms in the mean time while they're not needed as bedrooms could be a play area for the kids where they keep their toys and games, a quiet room to devote one's self to praying and reading the Bible, studying about God, a personal library with all the books your family has accumulated over the years that are sitting in boxes because you don't want to throw them away, and you don't know what else to do with them because they take up too much space, hobby rooms for you, your kids, your husband, your parents, his grandmothers, to use so that they don't have to feel like they're doing nothing in the house all day, an exercise room with weights and aerobic things, a company room for when your kids have sleep-overs and you don't want to hear them or when you have friends over for tea or a Bible study, although, the living room is usually reserved for that, having a separate room for that will help you to avoid disturbing the peace of the elderly who often enjoy periods of peaceful silence.
If someone is into film photography, you could use the room as a darkroom to develop pictures, although, if you're going to do that, you should probably discuss that before building the room as you will likely need running water, a drain, and well-placed switches for the different lights, and a way of cutting absolutely all light either from the entire room or from a section of it, such as a closet so that you can transfer the negative strip from the container to the bathing receptacle so that you can develop it.
Well, good luck. I totally agree with you, and it would be nice aesthetically, but if your husband's a practical-type, he may be more receptive to the idea of an extra room or two that can be used for other things, and later converted into a bedroom if the need arises. Just don't let it happen that they become storage closets because if that happens you'll never be able to let company use it as a bedroom.
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Title Post: Should Kids be allowed to be in robe all day and play computer games, mother is at work, no father.?
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